Valentine’s Day is centered on romantic love, where individuals buy their loved one(s) flowers, chocolates, and maybe even a fancy dinner. With a day centered around love, one might wonder why we can’t also direct that love inward to ourselves. How often is it that we get the chance to pause and appreciate ourselves the way we do others? For many, practicing self-love can be a foreign concept but is essential for forming secure attachments and high self-esteem.
Understanding Self-Love
When self-love is expressed, it is often misconstrued as selfishness, boastfulness, or even as far as “narcissistic,” which is far from the truth. In other cases, it’s used as a buzzword to attract people into buying the “next best thing” to make them feel better about themselves. Neither of these truly approaches the true definition of self-love, which is a deep and genuine appreciation for oneself. It involves recognizing and accepting who you are, celebrating your achievements, and embracing your imperfections with a sense of self-worth.
In a world that often prioritizes external validation, self-love is a radical act of self-acceptance, regardless of what the external world says. It means acknowledging your strengths, nurturing your well-being, and understanding that you are deserving of love and care simply because you exist.
Practicing Self-Love on Valentine’s Day
Valentine’s Day seems as good of a day as any to begin practicing self-love, but self-care should not stop after that. Consider incorporating the following practices into your day to celebrate and cherish yourself:
- Create and practice your own self-care rituals. Self-care is not limited to hot baths, face masks, or skin care routines. Self-care can also be doing your favorite hobby, like reading, painting, going for a walk, going to the gym, or practicing mindfulness.
- Positive Affirmations and Gratitude. Start your day by looking in the mirror and affirming positive statements about yourself. This can be extremely hard/uncomfortable for many at first, but even if you start by saying what you are grateful for about your body. For example, starting with “I am grateful that I have a body. I am grateful that I have a face” would suffice as a starting point. And who knows? Maybe that will turn into “I am grateful for my eyes, my hair, the color of my hair, and the way that my body looks.” Acknowledging your strengths and expressing gratitude for your unique qualities is a wonderful way to build self-love. This practice can significantly boost your self-esteem and reinforce a positive self-image.
- Setting Boundaries and Prioritizing the Self. Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be about pleasing others at the expense of your own well-being. Learn to say no to activities that drain your energy and focus on what truly matters to you. By setting boundaries and prioritizing yourself, you cultivate a healthier relationship with your own needs and desires.
It is natural for these practices to feel unnatural at first, especially if self-love is something that is new to you. But starting slowly and keeping it consistent is a wonderful way to build a quality relationship with yourself.
Building Self-Love by Reflecting on Personal Growth
Take some time this upcoming Valentine’s Day to sit down and journal about how far you have come to get where you are. In what ways have you overcome challenges, and what did you learn from them? Celebrate the freedom to explore your passions and spend time with friends and family. Set personal goals for self-improvement and commit to ongoing personal growth. Remember that self-love is not a destination but a continuous journey of self-discovery and improvement.
Self-Love As A Celebration
In conclusion, Valentine’s Day is a beautiful opportunity to celebrate love in all its forms, and that includes the love you have for yourself. Self-love takes time to build, and working alongside a trained therapist is a great way to navigate self-love with support. To learn about our team at Heartland Therapy Connection and whether or not one of our clinicians would be a good fit, contact us to learn more or to schedule.
By understanding self-love, engaging in meaningful activities, and reflecting on personal growth, you can turn Valentine’s Day into a day of self-celebration. Remember, self-love is not a one-time event—it’s a lifelong journey that deserves attention and care. So, this Valentine’s Day, let love begin with you.
